Red Herring/FKA Jourdan by Jourdan Blair

With due respect to the noisy solitude – it’s my turn
I have questions that lose breath
Every unanswered moment & counting
Dear 1682; so blessed, so beautiful,
You sparkle like a gem in any chronology
Historical Meghan Markle on & off camera Pre & post-production, eternal pulchritude; you

Three centuries later,
When I met you in celebration harbor & you took your look,
What did you give me in return?

Was it these ghosts that I’ve
Been such a gentleman to?
Always putting myself second, opening every door, Taking them with me everywhere I go
Allowing them to live to their,
Fullest, realest & truest
Allowing them to be . . . me
Killing what I starve,
Giving life to the fear that I feed
Rejecting people I want
Running from love that I need

I guess it’s time to die
As long as my ghosts are alive
So long as the host’s alive
Demons continue to thrive
It’s detrimental logic I
Walk with in my back pocket
I hear a feint signal say stop it
Every now again – I won’t lie.

Where light is darkness &
Laughter is pain; where I remain
I try my hardest to
Handle rejection & imperfection
Will I be drowning forever,
Beneath desire for retweets?
Will I be dying forever,
Wounded by guilty pleasure?
Will I be lost forever?
Content with everything that I’m not,
Never who I want to be?

I made my mark in that same June
You were born in too
Now the universe stands by
as two cities burn alive
I burn inside to look into reflections & see my own eyes I crave to go & visit Pennywise & let my rubber fly
Refuse to cry until my tear drops dry because finally I die...
And let you stay alive...
This is farewell for the remainder.